A very personal anniversary introspective

On 12|12|12 I launched life i design.  Yes the date was planned.  The woowoo part of me likes all things numerology, lunar, crystals and tarot.  

shit is hard.jpg

Today is 12/12/17.  5 years later.  

I woke up this morning thinking about how much has happened in the last 5 years.  How much I've learned. How much I've grown. How many times I've wanted to quit.  Cry.  Curse.  Celebrate. 

Today, I've been up since 6:30am.  I've painted. Checked email.  Texted my husband who travels often a "good morning, is your flight on-time" message . Shovelled the driveway. Drove my son to school.  Walked to Starbucks with my daughter and the dog.  Now am enjoying my holiday spiced flat white as I count all my blessings.

When I launched life i design 5 years ago.  I had two goals in mind; 

  1. to create art and have it be the basis of my business while defying the stigma of the "starving artist" persona,
  2. to share my journey and art and inspire others to live a life they design. Whether I share through blog posts or social media sharing.

Although my path has veered and curved and done a few loop-de-loops, I am still living with those same two goals in mind.  They just look a little different.

Starting a business, career, venture or adventure is not easy.  The ideas may come easy.  The enthusiasm and the excitement may come easy.  But the daily grind is something that you have to get through no matter how shitty you are feeling.  No matter how defeated you are.  No matter how many other obligations take priority.

I remember a time about a year and a half ago, when I was ready to quit.  I experienced a few too many consecutive days of disappointment.  Unhappiness.  Struggle.  I was putting in a lot of effort.  Hours and hours of energy and felt like I wasn't in the flow.  The return was just not there.  Then out of know-where, something clicked and it all came together for me. 

I look back at those moments now and think about what would have happened had I quit.  But I don't think about it for long.  With every struggle comes an achievement.  Maybe not right away, but they come.  That's what I think about.  

I think about all the amazing experiences I've had.  The freedoms that I enjoy.  The people that I meet and get to work with.  Online and in person.  The knowledge that I've accumulated and the thick skin that I've grown.  The encouragement from others and sharing. The simple act of creating something and feeling proud about it.

Today I hope that just one person reading this introspective post, is encouraged to try something new.  Set an idea into motion.  To enjoy the feeling of accomplishing something that they've planned, taken action to achieve and the journey that it has taken them on. To be able to look back a year from now, or five years from now and to be proud of all that they've experienced. 

As I work on my goals for 2018, I think I'll add "share more candidly how to take a leap of faith and live a life you design!"

Happy Anniversary to me!